sub-zero trust in health services
… and so what, who cares.
Seems appropriate that, on my 62. birthday, I let my thoughts wander onto matters that affects my life today. The headlines says it all really, and those thoughts color this day as much as they have colored most days in the year past, and are likely to color most days in my future … and who cares.
Now, if I have an incident that requires immediate medical assistance, break a leg or something,
I may find a visit to the hospital acceptable.
If on the other hand it is a medical condition that needs “fixing”, with the experiences I have had with the Norwegian Health Services in Kristiansand lately fresh in mind, I most likely won't go through with it, no matter the outcome.
I am of course referring to the s.c. “cancer treatment” I went through a year ago, after which I decided to drop all further “control and (possible) treatment”. As my knowledge about, and experience with, what the “cancer treatment” actually was/is all about increases, there is no doubt in my mind that the s.c. “cure” I have been through is far worse than the disease itself.
Before the “medical experts” lured me into going for the “cancer treatment”,
I had few problems compared to what I have now. And, as some of the same “experts”
later admitted: the type of cancer I had would probably not have caused my death nor any real
problems, so might as well have been left alone.
With this knowledge in mind, from now on forward I rather die than go through something like that again. And, when I finally do die one day, the s.c. “cure” most likely will have cost me more good years than I will have gained from it … and the damned bastards knew that all along.
no real information provided…
I won't waste time on arguing with those who think, and say, that “medical experts” know best, as that has nothing to do with me. The “medical experts” can have all the medical knowledge in the world for all I care, as all that matters to me is what they do with it, or don't.
I am the only one who can make important decisions regarding me and my own life, and if I can not trust those “medical experts” to inform me timely and properly, all else about their very existence is totally irrelevant.
My point is: the “medical experts” who were supposed to inform me beforehand, did not tell me any of what I needed to know to make an informed decision about whether to go for what one of them called a “100% cure”, or not. If they had informed me properly, as is their duty, I would simply have declined and walked away.
What I know now about the s.c. “100% cure” and its many side-effects, is all based on information I have been given, or have been able to collect from various sources, after the “treatment” was over. That, my dear “medical experts” and whoever else who might bother to have an opinion on the issue, is a little too late to do me any good.
As it is now I am damaged for life, and all because the s.c. “medical experts” did not inform me properly in time. They did not even inform me about, or did anything to avoid, the easily avoidable side-effect of getting thrombus in my legs from the “treatment”. As a result I ended up having to go through even more treatment just to survive the “cancer treatment”. Talk about “medical experts”…
Thank God there was at least one capable doctor at that hospital – one that (luckily for me) wasn't involved in “treating cancer”, or else I most likely would have been totally crippled, or dead, by now. Instead, I “only” lost proper sensation in and use of my left leg because of all the nerves that was cut in order to get access to and remove those clots and repair the blood vessels. I can walk alright, but it hurts.
In hindsight I am not sure if a single one of those involved in the “cancer treatment” they put me through, is really qualified to have anything to do with humans at any level. And, I sure would not trust any of them with animals, not even with patting a dog – they might kill the poor thing.
Yeah, some might think that some of those involved had good intentions, and they may be right. But, as the word goes: “the road to hell is paved with good intentions”, and I have no immediate desire of going that way.
So, why the hell don't those involved in all medical professions in the Norwegian health services keep their good intentions to themselves, and let those of us whose lives they intend to mess up, be well enough informed to stay out of their way if we so choose?
To make it all very clear and personal, I would like to say to every individual involved in my “cancer treatment”, that: “you most certainly have not done me any favors by messing up my life this way, regardless of your intentions. Why don't you try the same “treatment” on yourself – including having to deal with all side-effects, so you at least know what you're doing. Then – maybe – someone else won't have to suffer as much.“
just another day
I started to write this article as I was about to celebrate my 62. birthday,
and continued writing on it throughout the day. It was as good a day as any for transforming into words my
thoughts on the health issues I have had to deal with for the last year and a half, and that I will
have to continue battling with for many years to come.
Despite all the “happy birthday” wishes I have received – on Facebook and elsewhere – for which I am grateful, I am not celebrating anything regarding this day in my life really. It is just another day … a day I really could have done without.
If I hadn't had the fortune of sharing life with the woman I love – who (luckily for me) also happens to love me, I don't think I would have been around to see the sun rise on this day. I simply wouldn't have bothered if it wasn't for her.
As it is, I go on with life even if I have next to no interest in it for myself. I handle the sometimes quite severe physical pain with (perfectly legal and pretty potent) stuff you can not buy in a pharmacy. Mentally I can hardly feel anything – another (wonderful) side-effect of the “treatment” they did not inform me about, so no good vibrations here.
I am not disillusioned because of the latest “happenings” in my life, probably because I lost all illusions regarding mankind decades ago. I turned into an observer of life more than a living human being back then, and am of course also observing myself – which (in a sense) can be quite fun at times.
It is amazing what one can achieve with sheer will-power and the ability to pretend, when in an almost permanent
state of boredom – call it depression if you like. Minor distractions help, especially when one has nothing
to lose, and look at death as a relieve – the true “100% cure” for everything.
That nothing of what I do really matters to me personally, isn't important. It matters to the one next to me, and that will have to do, for now.
Weeki Wachee 12.apr.2015
last rev: 13.apr.2015